{"id":3576,"date":"2018-06-13T13:45:19","date_gmt":"2018-06-13T13:45:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/?p=3576"},"modified":"2024-04-21T06:34:01","modified_gmt":"2024-04-21T06:34:01","slug":"coltu-pinguinului-46","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/?p=3576","title":{"rendered":"COLTU PINGUINULUI"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>Tanti Nu\u021ba Cucu a fost la mitingul pesedist. S-a sculat cu noaptea-n cap, s\u0103 prind\u0103 loc \u00een autocar, deasupra conductei cu aer condi\u021bionat, c\u0103 autocarele astea au, dar dau p\u0103 preferin\u021be, \u0103lea d\u0103 la pedeleu nu aveau aer, da puteai s\u0103 de\u0219chizi geamurile \u0219i s\u0103 tr\u0103ie\u0219ti bine, cu sau f\u0103r\u0103 B\u0103selu, ce mai…
\nA dat peste singura familie civic\u0103 d\u0103 diziden\u021bi care tr\u0103ie\u0219te \u00een Severin \u0219i care s\u0103 filmeaz\u0103 s\u00eenguri prin toate spa\u021biile publice ale ora\u0219ului, cu sau f\u0103r\u0103 voie d\u0103 la domn Mausic\u0103 Primarele, c\u0103 ailal\u021bi, d\u0103 la alte partide, nu mai conteaz\u0103, c\u0103 nu e campanie. \u0102\u0219tia au filmat-o \u0219i au pus-o p\u0103 toate re\u021belele civice, s\u0103 vad\u0103 poporul severinean \u00een ce tab\u0103r\u0103 joac\u0103 tanti Nu\u021ba Cucu, de s-a ru\u0219inart, s\u0103rmana, \u0219i a vrut s\u0103 se \u00eentoarc\u0103 acas\u0103, dar a oprit-o, d\u00een drum, nea Z\u00eem\u021ba, cel mai bun propagandist, care i-a ar\u0103tat adeziunea la casa p\u0103rinteasc\u0103 a Haiducului d\u0103 la Hinova. Asta, s\u0103 cad\u0103 p\u0103 spate, nu alta, c\u0103 nu s\u0103 poate, nu s\u0103-ntoarce V\u0103caru s\u0103 sug\u0103 la \u021b\u00ee\u021ba partidului p\u0103 care l-a \u00eenjurat, c\u0103 e d\u0103 domeniul pornografiei, \u0219i el e mai mult d\u0103 domeniul prostiei… Coane, cum st\u0103team eu a\u0219a cu pancardele, pamblicile \u0219i steagurile a\u0219tept\u00e2nd s\u0103 vin\u0103 autocaru, vin doi spre mine cu aparate \u0219i \u00eencep s\u0103 boscorodeasc\u0103 \u00een limba pesedist\u0103, ca s\u0103 m\u0103 trag\u0103 d\u0103 limb\u0103, \u0219i p\u0103 urm\u0103 \u00een limba penelist\u0103, ca s\u0103 m\u0103 dea \u00een g\u00eet la ceilal\u021bi. Cu chiu cu vai am sc\u0103pat d\u0103 ei, c\u0103 tare nevrico\u0219i erau p\u0103 ciuma ro\u0219ie, pesemne nu le-o fi priit ketchupul d\u0103 p\u0103 pi\u021ba luat\u0103 d\u0103 la liberali. Ori au alergie la ro\u0219u, ori nu mai disting culorile, s\u0103racii, c\u0103 tare abramburi\u021bi erau, de-mi venea s-o sun p\u0103 tanti Abramburica, adev\u0103rata poant\u0103-pre\u0219edint\u0103 a viitorului nostru. \u00cen fine, m-am suit \u00een autocar, lume, mult\u0103, ce s\u0103 spui, am z\u0103rit, cu coada oichiului, \u0219i vreo 2-3 liberali sub acoperire, dup\u0103 care au \u00eenceput s\u0103 vin\u0103 alte autocare, galbene ca spicul gr\u00eeului, de-am crezut c\u0103 le-a trimis Virgilic\u0103 liberalul, nu alta! A fost frumos drumul, unii au c\u00eentat, al\u021bii au \u00eenjurat, eu am stat \u00een scaunu meu \u0219i am citit ultimele matale crea\u021bii, care s\u0103 potrivesc vremurilor actuale de-mi venea s\u0103 dau palme s\u00eengur\u0103. Cred c\u0103 m\u0103 las de politic\u0103 \u0219i m-apuc d\u0103 citit. Acum am ajuns la concluzia c\u0103 scrisul e greu, al matale nu prea, c\u0103 scrii d\u00een amintiri, \u0219i amintirile matale multe-s inventate, d\u0103 dragul operei \u0219i al premiilor literare, bag sam\u0103. Am r\u0103mas surprins\u0103 ca \u0219oarecele-n capcan\u0103 c\u00eend am v\u0103zut c\u0103 te asemeni, p\u0103 la unele vorbe, cu marii litera\u021bi ai vremurile d\u0103 demult apuse. Stilul matale nu e definitoriu \u0219i tocmai d\u0103 aceea \u00ee\u021bi recomand s\u0103 aprofundezi \u021bumbai\u0219pilul ironic, sacadat, al virgulelor puse la jmekereal\u0103, s\u0103 fie derutat cetitorul \u0219i s\u0103 nu carecumva s\u0103 lase cartea d\u00een m\u00een\u0103 pentru o alta. O s\u0103 \u00eencerc, p\u0103 viitor, s\u0103 fiu cel mai fidel critic al operei matale, cu condi\u021bia s\u0103 m\u0103 invite toate partidele la mitingurile lor, c\u0103 atmosfera d\u00een autocar nu s\u0103 compar\u0103 cu aia d\u0103 acas\u0103, unde, una-dou\u0103, vine Bogdaprostu \u0219i strig\u0103 la poart\u0103 s\u0103-nt\u0103r\u00eete c\u00eeinele, ba vine nea Milogogu seara, s\u0103 spun\u0103 c\u0103 a descoperit taina becurilor LED cu care a-nviorat primarele vea\u021ba d\u0103 noapte-n urbea noastr\u0103. C\u0103rt\u0103rescu \u0103la, d\u0103 la Bucure\u0219ti, nu e departe, spun eu, \u0219i prev\u0103d c\u0103 viitorul matale literar artistic e plin d\u0103 opere mult mai d\u0103 valoare ca ale mnealui. Cu condi\u021bia s\u0103 iei drumul Bucure\u0219tiului \u0219i s\u0103 te ba\u021bi cu el d\u0103 la egal la egal. \u00cen versuri \u0219i scrieri, ca s\u0103 moar\u0103 criticii d\u0103 nasoleal\u0103 parcimonioas\u0103 c\u0103 ei nu \u0219tie ce-i valoarea dac\u0103 nu le c\u00eent\u0103 Adi Minune la \u021bambal SIMFONIA BERZELOR.
\nMai am multe s\u0103-\u021bi spun, dar mai bine te las s\u0103 te semnezi, c\u0103 e\u0219ti \u00een vea\u021b\u0103,
\nPINGUINU CU MUSTA\u021a\u0102<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Tanti Nuța Cucu a fost la mitingul pesedist. S-a sculat cu noaptea-n cap, să prindă loc în autocar, deasupra conductei cu aer condiționat, că autocarele astea au, dar dau pă preferințe, ălea dă la pedeleu nu aveau aer, da puteai să deșchizi geamurile și să trăiești bine, cu sau fără Băselu, ce mai… A dat […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5975,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[826],"tags":[1817,1819,1816,1820,1818],"class_list":["post-3576","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-coltu-pinguinului-2","tag-abramburica","tag-haiducul-de-la-hinova","tag-mausica-primarele","tag-vacarul","tag-virgilica-liberalul"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3576","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3576"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3576\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9583,"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3576\/revisions\/9583"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/5975"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3576"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3576"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3576"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}