{"id":1099,"date":"2013-04-02T12:48:46","date_gmt":"2013-04-02T12:48:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/?p=1099"},"modified":"2013-04-02T12:48:46","modified_gmt":"2013-04-02T12:48:46","slug":"coltu-pinguinului-10","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/?p=1099","title":{"rendered":"COLTU PINGUINULUI"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>N-avusei de lucru \u015fi m\u0103 luai dup\u0103 tanti Nu\u0163a Cucu, care-mi strig\u0103-n termopan azi diminea\u0163\u0103, c\u00eend ningea de-mi venea s\u0103 tai porcu vecinului, c\u0103 pe-al meu l-am m\u00eencat: &#8222;ME\u015eTERE, du-te, drag\u0103, la ai liberali, c\u0103 vine Marcel Vela s\u0103-mpace M\u00ee\u0163u cu Duicu \u015fi s\u0103-l proclame pe domn Mazilu cet\u0103\u0163ean european, cu drepturi, nu a\u015fa&#8221;. \u015ei m\u0103 luai dup\u0103 a nebun\u0103, c\u0103 nu mai sc\u0103pam de gura ei \u015fi-mi era s\u0103 nu-mi ridice-n cap p\u0103rin\u0163ii, \u015fi m-am dus la Club G, unde tanti Nu\u0163i Udrea pusese, mai \u00een urm\u0103, cear\u015fafuri albe-n geam, s\u0103 n-o spioneze Ghiciulescu (sic!) c\u00eend cade cu tavanul pe podele. \u00cen fine, la clubu \u0103sta, numai lume bun\u0103, de-aia nu am vrut s\u0103 vin\u0103 \u015fi tanti Nu\u0163a Cucu. \u015ei anume, fostul primar Balaure, care-a speriat Rogova, actualul primar Cioar\u0103, de la T\u00eemna, care n-a speriat pe nimeni, c\u0103-i om bun, primari mul\u0163i, colora\u0163i de nea Mihai St\u0103ni\u015foar\u0103 c\u00eend cu portocaliu, c\u00eend cu verdele menemeha\u015fului, c\u00eend cu alian\u0163a aia dreapt\u0103 a ARD-ului, de nu mai \u015ftia nea Duicu cu cine s\u0103 voteze. Ascultai, cu urechile ciulite, la Marcel Vela, simpatic foc, nu alta, un fel de b\u0103cui mai de\u015ftept, mai deschis la nou, la construc\u0163ii, nu ca al\u0163ii, care d\u0103r\u00eem\u0103 zi \u015fi noapte de-a ajuns me\u015fterul Manole s\u0103-\u015fi caute partid. \u00cen st\u00eenga lui Vela, nea Nelu al nostru, simpaticelu M\u00ee\u0163u, \u015fugub\u0103\u0163 ca de fiecare dat\u0103 \u015fi tare r\u0103u la vorbe aruncate spre Gilian, al lui Bidilici, de la tele2. Nout\u0103\u0163i nu prea ne spuse domn liberal Vela, \u00een afar\u0103 de faptul c\u0103 da, a fost primarul Gherghe la ei, le-a f\u0103cut curte dar nu s-a mai \u00eenscris, i-a l\u0103sat cu poarta deschis\u0103, cum s-ar zice, \u015fi nu e corect. C\u0103-n politic\u0103 trebuie s\u0103 ai cuv\u00eent, nu numai s\u0103 fii binecuv\u00eentat, cum s-ar zice. O sunai pe tanti Nu\u0163a Cucu s\u0103 se uite-n statistica mea personal\u0103 ce hram mai poart\u0103 T\u0103nase St\u00eeng\u0103, c\u0103 era-n sal\u0103, Ionu\u0163 Buculeasa, la fel, \u015fi Cristinel Covrig, pepededi\u015fti care m\u0103 derutar\u0103. Dup\u0103 ce-l altoi pe primarele Gherghe, domn liberal Vela ne spuse s\u0103 nu mai citim MIORI\u0162A \u015fi BALTAGUL, c\u0103 nu-i a bun\u0103 c\u00eend se unesc doi ca s\u0103-l omoare pe-al treilea. La noi, la Mehedin\u0163i, miori\u0163a s-a dus dracu de mult, pa\u015fte fier vechi pe la CELROM \u015fi r\u00eeg\u00eeie a \u015fomaj, iar baltagul \u0103la st\u0103 nefolosit, c\u0103 nea Duicu d\u0103, mai nou, cu Jeepul. E tare-n idei domn Vela, da nu-l ajunge pe Nelu-al nostru. P\u0103i, c\u00eend o sta de-a-n-dreapta lui nea Duicu nu cel\u0103lalt Adrian, ci ditamai fostu prefect, ei, unde crede\u0163i c\u0103 se ridic\u0103 reitingu? La Karisma sau la Galaxy? C\u0103 nea George prospecteaz\u0103 eterul \u00een c\u0103utarea unei re\u0163ele de cablu, s\u0103-ngroape concuren\u0163a. Care, nimeni nu \u015ftie. V\u0103 las, c\u0103 v\u0103d c\u0103 m\u0103 sun\u0103 tanti Nu\u0163a Cucu, cred c\u0103 iar o mu\u015fc\u0103 dihania aia de c\u00eeine de mi-a adus-o \u015foferul de pe maidanele politice. Al vostru, cu drag \u015fi acela\u015fi ideal (galben) \u00een via\u0163\u0103, nimeni altu dec\u00eet&#8230;<br \/>\n&#8230;PINGUINU CU MUSTA\u0162\u0102<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>N-avusei de lucru &#351;i m&#259; luai dup&#259; tanti Nu&#355;a Cucu, care-mi strig&#259;-n termopan azi diminea&#355;&#259;, c&icirc;nd ningea de-mi venea s&#259; tai porcu vecinului, c&#259; pe-al meu l-am m&icirc;ncat: &bdquo;ME&#350;TERE, du-te, drag&#259;, la ai liberali, c&#259; vine Marcel Vela s&#259;-mpace M&icirc;&#355;u cu Duicu &#351;i s&#259;-l proclame pe domn Mazilu cet&#259;&#355;ean european, cu drepturi, nu a&#351;a&rdquo;. &#350;i [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[476,773,772,25,475],"class_list":["post-1099","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stiri","tag-coltu-pinguinului","tag-marcel-vela","tag-miorita","tag-mitu","tag-pinguinu-cu-mustata"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1099","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1099"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1099\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1099"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1099"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cronicadeseverin.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1099"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}